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Hello, all! I have decided that since I’ve fallen behind in a weird way between posts, travels, and photos, I’m just going to do a general update in an attempt to get back on track.
Now that I’ve taught for a grand total of eight weeks, it’s time for a bit of a recap on what exactly it means to be an assistante de langue étrangère. The TAPIF website makes being a language assistant appear to be this amazing job where you work few hours, are paid enough to live on, meet new friends, enjoy cultural exchange, and have the time to travel around Europe if you choose. Based on just *my* experience (and only the first ¼ of my experience), it’s actually quite different. From what I have seen from other assistants on Facebook, this job can REALLY vary based on your académie, schools, and teachers who are “in charge” of you. I have heard from assistants who have had a really difficult time with any or all aspects of the job and moving to France, and others who love it and wouldn’t change anything (except maybe the pay, because who are we kidding?). So far, I can say that I am still glad to be here and that I took this chance, but just like literally everything else in this world, it’s by no means perfect. Is it what I expected? Not really. Would I do it all over again? Definitely.
It’s an odd job…I work so little, no one really follows the “rules” of the position, and inconsistency is the name of the game. Technically, I’m supposed to be just an “assistant” to the teacher—so they are supposed to help me with my lesson plans, give me groups of about six students at a time, I wouldn’t be doing formal lessons but instead more speaking activities and games OR working with the teacher in the classroom during lessons, and I should have been given more of an orientation/observation period so I would be more familiar with how students are used to being taught and disciplined, as well as their level of English. Instead, it’s mostly been a trial by fire with having to manage 33 groups of students and counting, being expected to come up with lesson plans and lectures with very short notice (today I was told literally ten mins before the lesson that I was supposed to do mock interviews with the students), and sometimes being asked to take the entire class (which is SUPER not allowed!). I place the blame on France in general, because what you say on paper and what actually happens in practice or very often two completely different things around here. The teachers at my schools are so harried and exhausted that we don’t really have time to meet and discuss the students or the lessons, ever, so all I can do is keep doing my best to be engaging and helpful for the students.
I think if I was doing this full-time, I would actually lose my mind. The fact that it’s juuuust 12 hours a week makes it doable. And speaking of, I still have yet to work all 12 hours in a week… I also never have the same schedule, which is honestly really annoying. It does mean I have the occasional day off, but I’m STILL meeting new groups of students. Luckily, I don’t have to grade them or track their progress individually, but it is frustrating that I won’t get to know them very well or see how they progress through the year. Since I’m split between nine different teachers, my expectations also really vary. Some want me to do a formal lecture on a topic that they’re already studying in class, some want me to do just speaking and accent practice, others really don’t care what I do and give me free rein. Obviously, the students are more interested and engaged when we talk about holidays, culture, food, or music than when we have to talk about how universities work in America, so I much more enjoy being allowed to do whatever I’d like. However, I did have a class today that sat there scowling and super disinterested during a lesson on the Christmas/winter holidays and weren’t fazed whatsoever by a video of extreme Christmas light displays. So, you neeeeever really know what to expect.
It’s also worth noting that while I do have some teaching experience from the last few years, I am NOT a bona fide teacher. It’s been a bit of a surprise how the chemistry of the classroom works. I do my absolute best to be prepared for each lesson and to be upbeat and fun, but it’s really a 50/50 relationship. No matter how peppy I am, there are still some classes that absolutely will not behave or have zero interest in being engaged. It’s really the most frustrating part for me, because after teaching a class that asked a lot of questions and had fun with what we were doing, I feel AMAZING for the rest of the day. But I have about four groups who are almost hostile in not wanting to be in my class. After working with them several times, I think it’s just a matter of not wanting to be in school and also not being in an English class with the mindset of trying to be better at the language. Some students are just there to be babysat and put forth the absolute minimum til the bell rings.
If anything, the biggest surprise is how strict and disciplinary I’ve had to be as an assistant. The youngest students I have are 15 or 16 and they aren’t necessarily naturally naughtier than the older students, but they get frustrated more quickly since their level of English isn’t as high, then check out and start messing around. One group in particular is very weak in English and I have to fight for control of the classroom for the entire hour, so I feel like we really don’t get anything done after I’ve finally wrangled them into listening and sitting still. Other students are blatantly disrespectful and keep talking to their friends after I’ve asked them to stop four+ times. I catch myself doing and saying all of the things as my teachers in elementary school and I can’t tell if that’s good or bad. The most effective trick is making students move seats to be split up from their friends and I don’t think they really take me seriously until I make them move or take away their phones or make them spit out their gum—I get suuuuuch looks of betrayal like, “What???? You’re actually going to make me listen????”
My way of combating these behavior issues and lack of interest is having an arsenal of ESL games and activities up my sleeves that I incorporate into lessons as warm-ups and to finish out the hour. This way, they’re secretly learning and practicing English, but I have their attention. I plan on sharing some of the most successful games as a future post! However, there are still some students who are just not having it at all, and won’t participate or act like they’re having fun, and there are students who honestly have no idea what’s going on, even after their friends explain it in French.
French food continues to delight me! It’s fun to still be discovering new goodies in the grocery store and at markets. Lately, I’ve been trying to branch out in cooking a bit more and with new ingredients, but my kitchen leaves much to be desired in terms of functionality. I do have all of the tools I need, but none of the knives are sharp (to be fair, I haven’t had a properly sharp knife in my kitchen, ever) and the oven is basically a waste of time to use as it never gets very hot and takes an eternity to cook anything. So, I’ve been trying to do one pan or one pot meals as much as possible to reduce dishes and to make it a bit easier on myself. Some highlights from the last month or so include escargot, duck, bredelas, vin chaud, les batonnets de Noël, and guirlande de pomme de terre.
I had one of my dear friends visiting at the beginning of November, and we buzzed around the local area as much as possible for the two weeks she was here. We were also able to make it to Paris, the first time for both of us! One of my coworkers told us before we left that the whole city is like a big museum, and it really was. We tried to do as much as possible and see all the big sights in the short time we were there. The metro is SO EASY and you can really get around the city in what seems like no time at all. France has certainly shown me the wonders of public transportation, that’s for sure! By far my favorite part of the trip was going to the Louvre and Musée d’Orsay and seeing works of art I’d learned about in my French avant-garde class last year. It was like bumping into old friends, "Oh, I know you!"
Now that it’s December, it’s marché de Noël season! While the French don’t really decorate their homes (the most common decoration is a Santa dangling out the window), the towns themselves put up lights and host markets selling all sorts of Christmas goodies and crafts. Strasbourg is considered the Capital of Christmas and its markets date back to 1570. The region in general is famous for having the best and biggest Christmas markets in Europe, so it’s been such a treat to run around to as many as I can to enjoy the lights and Christmas cheer. In Guebwiller, they actually put up speakers all down the main street that play Christmas music—truly magical and makes me feel like I’m in a movie every time.
This is the last week of teaching before break, then it’s time for some holiday adventures and reflection on this year. It still hits me as surreal at times that I’m living and breathing in France as a TAPIF teaching assistant, and how much better I feel as a human for having so much less stress in my life. I often wish I could freeze myself at this age and point in life forever, but I’m also learning so much about myself that I know will help me live the life I want in the long-term. So when I catch myself wishing for this to never end, I just have to re-focus that energy into soaking it up as much as possible while I'm still here.
Til next time! I’ve attached a motley of photos from hikes, more visits to Strasbourg, Paris, and some of the Christmas markets for your scrollage.